The wonder of the WOW tic...

I have a tic.... it goes "WOW!"... it is annoying.

Yesterday, whilst at a cash machine,... alone... or so I thought. I popped my card in and then out of the blue came the "wow!" from my lips.

Thinking nothing of it I carried on, when I heard a small voice behind me say .. "That good huh?"...

Oh dear.... for a moment I was confused, and then it clicked... he thought I was saying "wow!" to my bank balance. If only that were the truth! I just smiled politely and said "Oh no no, I just ,... ummmm, yes".

Diagnosis...

I have been formerly diagnosed with having Tourette Syndrome from a neurologist, a doctor, a doctor neurologist, in his 50's, he must know what he is talking about. I trust him, he was nice to me.

I am not sure what it feels like. If I was more clued up with my emotions I like to think I would find it easy to tell you. Which is, interestingly, another "Tourettes thing" - emotions and finding them hard to understand. Almost like a different language. Tourettes and Autism are on the same spectrum and are very closely linked, so it would seem that my difficulties with emotions are all part of the same package.

Its a relief, I feel lighter, I feel understood. I don't have to beat myself up anymore. That bit of me, the bit that always wants to make noises and twitch, I can accept it, I can allow that bit of me to be me. It doesn't feel so lonely anymore, to ostracise a part of yourself is a very lonely feeling indeed.

I feel like I have suddenly been given permission to stand up for myself, it feels like I have myself back on my side again.